So, this has been the hardest transfer, and week of my life. I, and my family, are facing trials that I NEVER expected. I am out of patience, exhausted, shocked, and my heart is heavy with sorrow. "Nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted." (2 Nephi 4)
The crazy thing in all of this, and "all of this" is a lot of very difficult things right now, is that my testimony is unshaken. I am still 10000% that this gospel is true, and that this is the only true church on the earth, guided and directed by the Savior himself, through a living prophet.
I know that Satan is real, and that he sneaks into our lives and hearts as sneakily and quickly, and with as much power as he possibly can, just so that we will not be happy in this life, or the next one. He opposes everything I do as a missionary- sometimes through the very means and people that I expect to be able to turn to for support and repose. Well, it will not work. I will not give in. I have so much hope and love through my Savior, and those close to me who also have faith in Him.
Even when it seems like all is lost, He has not forsaken us:
45 And straightway he constrained his disciples to get into the ship, and to go to the other side before unto Bethsaida, while he sent away the people.
46 And when he had sent them away, he departed into a mountain to pray.
47 And when even was come, the ship was in the midst of the sea, and he alone on the land.
48 And he saw them toiling in rowing; [He watched them struggling at their oars] for the wind was contrary unto them: and about the fourth watch of the night [Between 4 and 6 in the morning] he cometh unto them, walking upon the sea, and would have passed by them. [He came with haste]
49 But when they saw him walking upon the sea, they supposed it had been a spirit, and cried out:
50 For they all saw him, and were troubled. And immediately he talked with them, and saith unto them, Be of good cheer: it is I; be not afraid.
51 And he went up unto them into the ship; and the wind ceased: and they were sore amazed in themselves beyond measure, and wondered.
My family and I will be okay, we will get through this, and for the next 8 months, I will struggle at my oars, I will serve with all that I've got. This is exactly where I need to be. Nothing changes that. He will come and calm the storm, soon. I know, because things have gotten harder so suddenly, that He is on his way. He has not forsaken me, or my sweet family. He is allowing us to grow, and for that I am grateful.
Love you all. I'll let you know what happens with transfers.